April 16, 2007
- Way Too Frequently Asked Questions -
Q: Are you serious? (From My Mom)
A: Yes.
Q: Yeah I get that, but seriously, is this legit? (From My liver)
A: Still yes.
Q: Isn't losing that much weight so fast really unhealthy for you? (From My Heart)
A: No more unhealthy than cutting myself during a "My Super Sweet 16" Marathon.
Q: Seriously, can't you die? (From The Common Sense Portion of My Brain [very small])
A: A small piece of me dies every day. I'm sure it can't be any riskier than lugging around 438+ pounds on all of my vital organs every day. Choose your poison.
Q: Are you really a Beekeeper? (Janice Beltknap - London, UK)
A: The answer to your query is yes.
Q: What's the most you've ever been stung? (Claire Walls - North Hampton, NH)
A: Probably over 200 times in a day.
Q: Do you have a nickname? Where did it come from? (Brock St. Pierre - Clemson, SC)
A: Yes. People call me "The Bear" or just "Bear" for short. I don't see it but you be the judge...
Q: Is your life really that miserable? (Kerry Pearson - Kansas City, MO)
A: Yes. On a scale of 1 to 10, it is pretty miserable.
Q: What inspires you? What motivates you? (J.C. Dunham - Phili, PA)
A: The thought of starring opposite Danny Devito in Twins 2.
Q: What scares you? (Bobby Monroe - Madison, Good Ol' Wisconsin)
A: The Amish. Dying alone.
Q: What happens if you don't finish the race? (Meghan Rodriguez - Tampa, FL)
A: Then the terrorists will have won... not an option.
Q: Will you marry me? (anonymous donor)
A: Yes.
Q: If not, why?
A: I already said yes. You know what, nevermind... you're too controlling.
Q: Jacob- you are the man. By the way, how do bees mate? (Handy Andy - New York, NY)
A: Very carefully... ZING!
Q: Will you tape your nipples so they don't rub off during the marathon? (Terry Hyke - Dovre Township, Wisconsin)
A: I perfected that art LOOOONG before this journey ever began.
Q: I wish you the best of luck on your journey. P.S. Jacob, who does your hair? (Nicole Wessen - MA)
A: Some homeless guy in the park. Sure he gets a little "touchy feely" at times... but you can't beat his prices.